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A guy orders drink after drink in a bar

A guy sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink.

“Is everything okay, pal?” the bartender asks.

“My wife and I got into a fight and she said she wasn’t going to talk to me for a month.”

Trying to put a positive spin on things, the bartender says,

“Well, maybe that’s kind of a good thing.

You know… a little peace and quiet?”

“Yeah. But today is the last day…”

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A retired man purchased a home near a high school

Boss you don’t have the balls