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A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.<\/p>\n
The doctor comes in and says, “Ah, I see you’ve regained consciousness.<\/p>\n
Now, you probably won’t remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway.<\/p>\n
You’re going to be okay, but your manhood was severed in the accident and we couldn’t find it.<\/p>\n
“The man groans, but the doctor goes on,<\/p>\n
“You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new manhood.<\/p>\n
They work great, but they don’t come cheap.<\/p>\n
It’s roughly $1000 an inch.”The man perks up.<\/p>\n
So, the doctor says, “You must decide how many inches you want.<\/p>\n
But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife.<\/p>\n
If you had a five-incher before and get a nine-incher now she might be a bit put out.<\/p>\n
If you had a nine-incher before and you decide to invest in a five-incher now, she might be disappointed.<\/p>\n
It’s important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision.<\/p>\n
“The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.<\/p>\n
The doctor comes back the next day,<\/p>\n
“So, have you spoken with your wife?”<\/p>\n
“Yes I have,” says the man.<\/p>\n
“And has she helped you make a decision?”<\/p>\n
“Yes,” says the man.”What is your decision?” asks the doctor.<\/p>\n
“We’re getting granite counter tops.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"